truth.

the individual who embodies your personal definition of love does not really exist. the person is real, and the feelings are real but you create the context. and context is everything. the person who defines your understanding of love is not inherently different than anyone else. and they're often just the person you happen to meet the first time you really, really want to love someone. but that person still wins. they win and you lose. because for the rest of your life, they will control how you feel about everyone else.

-i read that and i think it is one of the most true things, ever.
and it sucks. :( and you suck.



anyway, today I felt relatively better so I went to my classes. The past 2 days I've been pretty worthless considering all I really did was work Monday night and then hang out with Dion last night. Other wise, I've been in my house. Feeling like shit. So today I went to my classes then came home and cleaned my entire car, inside and out. It's about time considering it has recently turned into a shit hole since I basically live out of it. But now it is spaaaarrrkkklinn' :D

I'm glad it's already Wednesday because this weekend I am off, so it'll be a good weekend. I'm pretty sure I'm going down to the city Saturday night with Riss, which will be COOL. Oh, and I'm suppose to be getting my bike from my g-pop this weeeeek ! yay, he fixed it all up REAL nice for me. I'm stoked!

19 days till I leave for Iowa. I know I said it before, but I'm saying it again, I'm probably not going to want to come back once I get out there. Everyone that I've talked to that's been to Iowa really loved it, and I think I'm going to, too. Plus, my best friends there. I feel like I'm going to get out there, then just decide to not take that flight back. Except I guess in realitiy I'm going to have to since I'll only have a week or so worth of my clothes with me, and I would want all of them. :( but i guess who knows. we'll see what happens. Aaron's flying out there with me now, so this makes it even more great because now I don't have to fly out alone, and it'll be double fun with him out there hanging out, just like back when Ashley lived in Jersey ! :)

The next few weeks though should be pretty good ones. NFG & FYS on September 24th with biggie sMAllz & ott. that'll be fun, especially since it'll be freeee. Then The Ataris are playing at Gywnedd Mercy college September 28th and I might go to that. I don't dig their new stuff, but I love their old stuff. We'll see. October 1st is Jamie's 19th birthday, so paaarttaay. I go to Iowa October 7th-15th. THEN MY BIRTHDAY is a week from when i get home, on October 22nd! YAY. And october 23rd is minus the bearrrr ! and october 27th is young widows! lookin' like a deeeecent next month or so. :)

I'm feeding my dog french fries and listening to 5ive.
haha, NO JOKE. SEEYA.